Verbal and non-verbal behavior

Each of us uses verbal and non-verbal behavior when communicating. We transmit information not only through speech, but also through a variety of means. In this article, we will consider verbally and nonverbal behavior in detail. You will learn many interesting facts about communication, and also receive a number of valuable tips.

Verbal Behavior

Verbal behavior involves communication with words. From early childhood, we are taught to express their thoughts logically, so an adult usually does not have problems with their expression. Ornateness of speech and eloquence are acquired with experience. However, only 7% of what we say is perceived by others through the meaning that is contained in words. The rest is through non-verbal reactions and intonation. In business communication, strangely enough, the most important factor is the ability to listen, not speak. Unfortunately, not many of us have learned to be attentive to what the interlocutor says.

Listening to emotions and facts is listening to the message to the fullest. In doing so, a person increases the likelihood that the information brought to him will be understood. In addition, by this he shows that he respects the message sent to the speaker.

The rules for effective communication, proposed by Keith Davis

Professor Keith Davis singled out the following 10 rules for effective hearing.

1. It is impossible to perceive information when you speak, so stop talking.
2. Help your companion to be liberated. It is necessary to make so that the person felt freedom, that is to create an unconstrained atmosphere.
3. The speaker should show your willingness to listen. You should act and look interested. Listening to the other, try to understand it, and not to look for reasons for objections.
4. Irritating moments must be eliminated. Avoid tapping on the table, drawing, shifting papers during communication. Perhaps with a closed door information will be perceived better?
5. The speaker should be empathic. To do this, try to imagine yourself in its place.
6. Be patient. Do not interrupt the interlocutor, do not save time.
7. Restrain the character. If a person is angry, he gives an incorrect meaning to his words.
8. Do not allow criticism and controversy. This forces the one who says to take a defensive position. He can also be angry or silenced. No need to argue. In fact, you lose if you win the dispute.
9. Ask the interlocutor questions. This will cheer him up and show him that he is being listened to.
10. And, finally, stop talking. This advice goes first and last, since all the others depend on it.

In addition to the ability to effectively listen to his interlocutor, there are other ways to improve the art of communication. Before the transfer of ideas, it is necessary to clarify them, that is, you should systematically analyze and consider the questions, ideas or problems that you plan to communicate to another. If you want to achieve success in your career or in your personal life, it is very important to take into account the different characteristics of interpersonal interaction. Researchers say that, along with verbal (verbal) communication, one must take into account the nonverbal language that people use.

Nonverbal language

It should be noted that this concept implies not only the control of one's behavior, the ability to interpret the facial expressions and gestures of a partner, but also the zone of a person's personal territory, its psychic essence. In addition, this concept includes the national characteristics of the interlocutors' behavior, their mutual disposition in the process of communication, the ability of partners to decipher the value of using such aids as cigarettes, glasses, lipstick, umbrella, mirror, etc.

Nonverbal behavior

Thinking about communication, we have in mind primarily language. However, it is only part of the means of communication, and perhaps not the main one in such a process as communication. Non-verbal behavior often plays an even greater role. We use a lot of ways to communicate our feelings, thoughts, aspirations and desires to surrounding people. Such means of communication are called non-verbal. This means that words or sentences are not used in them. Communication, considered in a broad sense, occurs not only verbally.

Nonverbal communication channels

They can be divided into two categories. The first is non-verbal behavior, and the second is characteristics not related to it.

Behavior "non-verbal" includes all kinds of behavior (except for pronouncing words) that take place in the process of communication. It includes:

• Facial expression ;
• Posture, orientation and inclination of the body;
• Gestures and foot movements;
• Height, tone of voice and other of its vocal characteristics, intonation and pauses, speed of speech;
• Touching;
• Distance in communication;
• Look, and also visual attention.

Thus, non-verbal behavior includes both what is usually associated with active self-expression and what relates to more subtle and less vivid manifestations.

As for non-verbal non-verbal communication, it covers a variety of signals and message sources that can not be derived directly from behavior. It is interesting that interpersonal communication is influenced by such trifles as the use of the type of clothing, time, architectural structures where we work and live, cosmetic amendments introduced by us into our appearance. All this is defined as a hidden form of communication. Such inconspicuous moments in the process of communication convey information to the interlocutor along with non-verbal behavior and language. Verbal and non-verbal communication in the perception of us a person constitute a single whole.

Non-verbal behavior is a rather complex and profound topic in psychology. However, some moments are not at all difficult to remember and take into account in everyday life. Below are some of the features of non-verbal behavior, the ability to interpret which is very important for effective communication.

Gestures and poses

The movements of the body and hands convey a lot of information about the person. In particular, they manifest the immediate emotional reactions of the individual and the state of his organism. They allow the interlocutor to judge what kind of temperament a person has, what reactions he has (strong or weak, inert or mobile, slow or fast). In addition, body movements and various poses reflect a variety of character traits, the degree of self-confidence in the person, impetuosity or caution, looseness or confinement. The social status of the individual is also manifested in them.

Such expressions as "straighten the shoulders" or "stand on the half-bent" are not just descriptions of poses. They determine in what psychological state the individual is. It should also be noted that gestures and posture are the non-verbal behavior of a person, in which the cultural norms adopted by an individual are manifested. For example, if a man is brought up, he will not talk while sitting, if his interlocutor is a woman and she is standing. This rule applies regardless of how a man assesses the personal dignity of this woman.

Signs, which are transmitted by the body, are very important at the first meeting, because aspects of the personality of the interlocutor's character do not appear immediately. For example, if you are getting a job, you should sit straight during an interview. By this you will demonstrate your interest. Also it is necessary to look the interlocutor in eyes, but not too aggressively.

As an aggressive position of the body is regarded as follows: a person is in tension, he is ready for movement. The body of such a man is filed somewhat forward, as if he is preparing to throw. This position seems to signal that aggression is possible on his part.

Gestures play a very important role in communication. Drawing attention, you can invocatively wave your hand. You can make a dismissive irritable gesture, twist your hand at the temple. Applause means thanksgiving or greeting. One or two clap hands is a way to attract attention. Interestingly, the clapping was used to attract the attention of the gods in a number of pagan religions (before sacrifice or prayer). Actually, modern applause went exactly from there. The arsenal of values that are transmitted and transmitted by clapping in the palm of your hand is very wide. This is understandable, because this gesture is one of the few that produce sound, and quite loud.

Mimicry

Mimicry is a person's non-verbal behavior, consisting in the use of a person's face. We are able to distinguish and interpret the most delicate movements of the facial muscles. Signed functions have the position or movements of various facial details. For example, we lift eyebrows in surprise, fear, anger or greeting. It is known that Aristotle was engaged in physiognomy.

Mimicry in animals and primitive people

It should be noted that not only in humans, but also in higher animals, facial expressions are present as non-verbal communicative behavior. Grimaces of great apes, although they are similar to human, but often express other meanings. In particular, a grin, which people could take for a smile, threatens the monkeys. The animal raises its gums to demonstrate its fangs. Many mammals (wolves, tigers, dogs, etc.) do the same.

By the way, this sign of threat, apparently, once was peculiar to man. This confirms that grinning from a number of primitive peoples is not only a smile, but also a sign of bitterness or threat. For these peoples fangs subconsciously still serve as combat weapons. By the way, in today's culture there is a memory of this meaning of such a grimace: there is a phraseology "show teeth", the meaning of which is "to demonstrate a threat or resistance."

Signals sent by the eyes

Signals sent by the eyes, too, relate to facial expressions. It is known that women shoot their eyes, coquetting. You can say "yes", batting eyelashes. Clear, direct look into the eyes of the interlocutor is considered a sign of a free and strong person. This view has its biological roots. In primitive peoples, as well as in the animal kingdom, it is often a challenge. Gorillas, for example, suffer from people around them, but a person does not have to look into the eyes of the leader, since the latter will regard this as an encroachment on his leadership in the herd. There are cases when a cameraman was attacked by a male gorilla, since the animal thought that the flashed camera lens is a challenge, a direct look in the eye. And today in our society such non-verbal behavior is considered bold. It is known that when people are not sure of themselves, when they are shy, they turn their eyes away.

Tactile communication

This includes patting, touching, etc. The use of such elements of communication is indicative of status, of mutual relations, and of the degree of friendship between the interlocutors. Relations between close people are expressed in stroking, embraces, kisses. Relations between comrades often involve pats on the shoulder, handshakes. Teenagers, like the cubs of animals, sometimes imitate scuffles. So they are fighting for leadership in the game form. Similar relationships between adolescents are expressed in kicks, pincers or seizures.

It should be noted that the signs that transmit non-verbal means of communication (touch, posture, facial expressions, etc.) are not as unambiguous as the words we say. Most often they are interpreted taking into account the situation, that is, those conditions in which they are observed.

Clothing as a way of non-verbal communication

In the intercourse between people, some other ways of non-verbal communication are known. For example, they include jewelry and clothing. Suppose, if an employee came to work in smart clothes, we can assume by this sign that today he has a birthday or he will have an important meeting. The use of clothing as a means of communication is often practiced in politics. For example, the cap of Luzhkov, the former mayor of Moscow, reported that he is the mayor of the people, the mayor is a "hard worker".

Thus, non-verbal behavior of the personality in psychology can be considered in many aspects. This phenomenon is of interest not only for scientists, but also for ordinary people. No wonder, because the culture of non-verbal behavior, like the culture of speech, is used in everyday life. The ability to correctly interpret words and gestures is useful to everyone. A deep understanding of the meaning of verbal / non-verbal behavior of people contributes to effective communication.