The problem of loneliness was relevant at all times. There is it in the modern world. Of course, today people use the Internet and various means of communication, which allow to communicate unlimitedly. However, according to psychologists, the one who most often refers to social networks, more than others feels a sense of loneliness, that is, the absence of a kindred soul. Sometimes such a person comes up with some life events and stories. And this is all in order to attract attention. Often the problem of loneliness arises in those people who do not want to accept the society that surrounds them.
They oppose themselves to others, try in every possible way to protect themselves from the whole world and often go against the generally accepted norms and traditions.
Child and loneliness
It is easier to agree with the existence of a problem in the case when a person does not have a family, friends and close people. However, situations are different. Sometimes the feeling of loneliness is visited by a person who is surrounded by relatives. Unfortunately, such a phenomenon exists, although it seems simply incredible.
So, there is the problem of the child's loneliness in the world of adults. Arguments given by psychologists testify to the danger of this phenomenon. After all, fears and emotions experienced at an early age, have a strong influence on the formation of the personality, and, consequently, for the whole life of a person. That's why adults should pay attention to the problem of their baby.
What are the reasons that the child becomes lonely? The most obvious of them is the lack of attention on the part of people close to him. Often, adults are so absorbed in their worries and problems that their children simply do not have enough free time. Think, maybe, in your family there was such a situation? If yes, then it requires immediate correction. And in favor of such a step, a weighty argument speaks. The problem of loneliness, according to psychologists, leads to the fact that children become withdrawn, oppressed and alienated. A child, left for a long time to himself, leaves in the world of his thoughts and fantasies created by him.
The cause of loneliness at an early age can also be the parents' wrong approach to parenting. Some popes and mothers mistakenly believe that it is better for the child himself to know what he needs. At the same time, the interests of the person who has not yet formed are ignored. It is impossible to put such pressure on a small person. And in this regard, psychologists have a weighty argument. The problem of loneliness, which has arisen in the process of such education, is able to alienate the child from the parents, as it gradually degenerates into a misunderstanding.
How to protect the child from loneliness?
The problem that arises requires immediate elimination. Of course, the ways to solve it are not easy, but they do exist. To drive away the feeling of loneliness from the child will help the constant efforts of people close to him. Parental love will be the main assistant in this. But it should be expressed not in material goods, but in sincere sensitivity, care and participation in the life of the baby. You need to constantly be interested in the affairs of your child and do not brush it off when he invites you to play with him.
The problem of children's loneliness in literary works
Many writers and publicists raised the issue of lack of attention to the life and interests of a small person. They often discussed how the problem of loneliness arises. Arguments from the literature that can be cited on this topic - the story of Pavel Sanayev - "Bury me behind the plinth". The protagonist of the work is the boy Sasha Saveliev. He tells readers about lost dreams and unfulfilled hopes due to the moral indifference of adults. The boy has no toys and no friends. All this is replaced only by a small mouse. When she does not, Sasha fully feels the loneliness of the child among adults.
The same feeling takes possession of the heroine of the story, written by Dina Sabitova "Three of your names." This is a story about the terrible fate of a girl who passed the real hell of a half-starved poor life first in her own family, and then in an orphanage and foster parents.
The main idea of all authors is the statement that every child should be happy. And adults should take care of this.
Often representatives of the strong half of humanity have no attachments and close ties. Some men consider this a norm. Is it so? In order to understand this question, it is necessary to consider what argument, in contrast to this, is given by psychologists.
The problem of loneliness, according to experts, can be hidden in the inadequate self-esteem of a man. Such a person simply leaves his relationship with the people around him. He is afraid of criticizing his abilities and talents, which will bring him pain.
The reason for the loneliness of a man may be the lack of communication skills in communicating with others. Often at the heart of such immaturity lies the shyness that arose from the psychological trauma received in childhood or in adolescence.
The cause of male loneliness may be the presence of social phobia. The roots of this phenomenon lie deep and lie in the imposition of an adult on the boy. For example, the beginning of a visit to the kindergarten in the psychological unpreparedness of the baby. This causes fright and leads to the desire to spend time alone, away from other children.
The reason for the isolation of a man can be psychopathology, expressed in depression, autism, schizophrenia, propensity to alcoholism. The problem of loneliness also arises in those young guys who have a strong emotional attachment to their mother. However, not only as a result of underdevelopment or degradation of personality, a person does not contact the world around him. As a direct opposite to all that has been said above, we can also cite another, rather weighty argument. The problem of loneliness sometimes becomes an element of spiritual growth. Here, talk is about the peak of human development.
The theme of the loneliness of men in literary works
The feeling of lack of attachment haunts many representatives of the strong half of humanity. Numerous arguments, to the problem of loneliness of a person having a direct relationship, are found in the works of domestic and foreign writers. There are books that are literally permeated with this feeling, and among them are the works of Gabriel Garcia Marquez.
In many works of this author, the problem of loneliness is raised. Arguments from the literature belonging to Peru Marquez - the hero of his novel "Stranger". In addition, Albert Camus wrote about loneliness, as well as Truman Capote ("Breakfast at Teffani") and Hermann Hesse ("Demian"). In these works, loneliness is a special life canvas with entwined hopes and torments, alienation and solitude, internal conflicts and contradictions.
A weighty argument to the problem of the loneliness of the person who chose the path of service is the novel by L. Tolstoy "War and Peace". In this work we see the image of the great commander Kutuzov. He saves the country and spares the lives of soldiers, giving Moscow without a fight. The main task that the commander-in-chief sets himself is to rid Russia of enemies with minimal losses for their army. However, the official authorities hold a different opinion. She wants to achieve glory at any cost. As a result, the author raises the problem of tragic loneliness of man. Arguments for her - the resignation, and then premature death of the great commander. Such is the payment for the decision made.
In many works of Russian writers the problem of loneliness was raised. Arguments from the literature on this issue are A. Pushkin's hero Eugene Onegin. At first glance, it could be attributed to a socially active person. Onegin was gladly accepted in secular society. And the hero received real pleasure from conducting such an idle life. However, at the end of the novel Onegin concludes that he was always "a stranger to everyone ...".
What other works raise the problem of loneliness? Arguments from the literature can be given the following:
- I. Turgenev's novel "Fathers and Sons". His main character Bazarov is lonely both in love, and in friendship and views.
- The novel by Yu. Lermontov "Hero of Our Time". In it, the image of Pechorin is a multifaceted loneliness, both lyrical and civil, as well as universal.
- Comedy by A. S. Griboedov "Woe from Wit". Her hero, Alexander Chatsky, is experiencing loneliness, not finding support for his thoughts in society. He sees his situation as a personal tragedy.
Complaints about this condition can often be heard from the fairer sex. And the theme of this loneliness worries, as a rule, it is the women themselves. Unfortunately, even married ladies or those who have a love relationship can experience this feeling.
What are the origins of this problem? Psychologists explain its presence:
-complexes and uncertainty, when women compare themselves with beauties from covers of glossy magazines;
- stereotypes, when the ladies believe that men love only blondes, marry bitch, etc.;
-the lack of meaning in the search for a partner.
But anyway, the psychology of female loneliness concerns, as a rule, the absence of a loved one nearby. About the emergence of this feeling, even those divorced girls who have children say. They project their condition on the baby, saying: "We do not need anyone." The woman's desire to have a family is inherent in nature. Little girls already in the kindergarten begin to play in their mother's daughters, cook soup in a plastic saucepan and swaddle the dolls. At the same time, they dream of a beautiful husband and a luxurious white veil.
However, such is the female psychology that, even wearing an engagement ring on the arm, a representative of the weaker sex can feel lonely. Often this is due to the fact that many families live as if by inertia, and the spouses are not interested in each other's moods and thoughts. Often there is a situation where a woman lovingly prepares dinner for her husband, receiving in return a "thank you" on duty.
Sometimes ladies doom themselves to loneliness after an unsuccessful novel. They are painfully experiencing the situation, experiencing humiliation. And here there is the problem of overcoming loneliness. Arguments given by psychologists indicate that it must be solved. Otherwise, the woman will become even more unhappy than she was before. Creating a new relationship will be hampered by fear of her prejudice, that all men are evil.
The theme of women's loneliness in literary works
AI Solzhenitsyn tells about the life of a simple Russian collective farmer in his story "Matrenin Dvor". This is a single woman who lost her husband at the front and buried six children. Matryona Vasilyevna, this is the name of the main heroine of the story, she alone struggles with the hardships of life. She, who has a seniority in the state farm, does not receive a pension. She could not get even for the loss of the breadwinner. However, Matryona did not lose her human feelings. She readily responds to someone else's trouble and continues to bear the cross of the keeper of the home.
Very bright female solitude is shown in the novel by L. Tolstoy "Anna Karenina." This work is about breaking the relationship of the main character with all spheres of life. Here the author also covers the problem of the influence of loneliness on a person. Arguments in favor of the fact that the love of Vronsky and Anna is doomed to failure is obvious. Alienation of society and its rejection of feelings that have arisen, contrary to the morality of secular circles. Young and cheerful at the beginning of the novel, the woman is eventually brought to complete despair and dies under the wheels of the train.
The Loneliness of Older People
The problem of unclaimedness, the emergence of a sense of abandonment and misunderstanding by the youth often accompanies the elderly. This is exacerbated by the fact that older people are also experiencing a lack of support and concern for the state. But it is often a problem of loneliness of a person who has devoted himself to others. Arguments in favor of the need for its solution are social aspects of the issue.
What are the reasons for the appearance of loneliness in advanced years? This is the absence of relatives and children or separate living from them. It's not easy for old people to endure the death of a spouse. The Russian state is characterized by another problem of loneliness in the elderly. Arguments for the old people's reclusion are financial helplessness and inability to cope with domestic and hygienic issues.
The theme of loneliness of the elderly in literary works
About the life of the old village woman narrates the story of K. G. Paustovsky "Telegram". His main heroine, Catherine Ivanovna, had to experience loneliness, despite the fact that she has Nastya's daughter. The author raises the problem of loneliness of old people. Arguments confirming its existence is the realization of the main heroine of its uselessness, because the daughter does not visit her for four years. This leads to the fact that an old woman lives out her days all alone.
The same problem was raised by AS Pushkin. In his story "The Stationmaster" he showed how terrible the picture of the loneliness of the old man. The hero of the story, Samson Vyrin was abandoned by his daughter, who followed her beloved.
The way that loneliness changes a person, N. Gogol showed us convincingly. The hero of his novel "Dead Souls" Plyushkin himself removed his children from himself. He was afraid that they would ruin him. The result of Plushkin's loneliness was the degradation of the individual.
One of the problems of residents of large cities
A huge crowd of people in megacities does not allow people to meet often and does not have close spiritual communication. Everyone is in a hurry and running about their business, often not paying attention to who is near. Women and men live as if by inertia. However, a certain moment comes, and each of them understands that there has come loneliness, because there is no one near. A description of such a state can be found in many literary works. It is also in F. Dostoevsky's novel "White Nights". In it the author raises the problem of loneliness of people in big cities. Arguments that confirm the existence of such a situation are the discrepancy of interests and the total separation of people. In the center of the story of FM Dostoevsky is the story of a lonely Dreamer. On his life, the girl met Nastenka. The dreamer falls in love with her and with her help tries to get out of the "dungeon" of loneliness.
However, Nastenka loves another and remains true to her feelings. She apologizes for her betrayal in a letter written to the Dreamer. He forgives the girl, but, continuing to love her, remains lonely in the cold city that does not understand him.