Man - a very complex creature, with a highly developed nervous system and pronounced mental activity. We are all - more or less - are emotionally affected. Anger, irritation, tearfulness or euphoria, "wool in the clouds" and "rose-colored glasses", mood swings - these are all manifestations of our world of feelings, without which man would long ago have turned into a robot-like, soulless creature.
Tears as a reaction to emotions with signs plus and minus
What emotions do we experience more often - positive or negative? It is rather difficult to answer this question. Yes, and who is able to calculate how many times we stretch our lips in a smile, sigh with relief or tense frown and wipe treacherous tears. It was only for the princess Nesmeyana that the buckets were placed during her sobbing, so she is a fairy tale! And can not we cry at all? From mental pain, physical, from sadness and even from joy? Absolutely - of course not! And why, for example, restrain yourself, if your eyes are on a wet place from a long-awaited meeting with your beloved person or if you are amused immensely by something? On the contrary, such emotions carry with them only positive, purifying and inspiring moments. And whether it is necessary not to cry, when it is really hard and some unpleasant events are pressed against the heart by a stone, disturb the consciousness, embarrass? Psychologists unequivocally say: on the contrary, in such cases, crying is not just necessary, but necessary! Why? Because, spilling out everything that boils up, we thus get a psychological discharge, and the body is freed from stress. If the negative is to keep within, to experience in silence, then emotions are pinched, squeezing our psyche, just as pressure is compressed by a spring. But this process is not infinite! And one day an explosion will follow, which can result in depression, neurosis, insomnia and many other serious problems. Do you want to control yourself in all situations, do not cry? Then in advance prepare to become a patient of a psychotherapist!
When you should restrain yourself
We examined situations in which tears are a protective natural reaction of the body to external stimuli. However, any emotion is a double-edged sword. When it acquires affective, i.e. Excessive, exaggerated forms, the picture begins to acquire a clinical appearance. And here, indeed, it should be understood that in other cases it is better to restrain and not to cry than to dissolve oneself and nurse on every occasion. And not always the situation has an open expression of feelings. If you are insulted, then showing tears in the offender means that you humiliate yourself even more, show your own weakness and sensitivity, that is, give your enemy an extra reason to gloat and triumph. Do you need this? So let's reflect on how to learn not to cry in an unseemly situation.
Learn to dominate
Yes, the first tip sounds exactly like that. Develop in yourself restraint and self-control, the ability to control emotions, to show strong-willed moment. A good support to you in this regard will be various auto-training. The simplest and most accessible way, how to calm down and not cry - several times to take a deep breath and count up to ... To 10, and to whom and more. The main thing is that after such an exercise you relax a little, take themselves in hand, and the feelings returned to the more familiar channel and degree. This, so to speak, advice for situations in the conditions of force majeure. In general, a long and hard work on yourself!
Proofs from the contrary
How not to cry if you want to? Another good tool is the ability to look at a problem from a slightly different position when it ceases to seem fatal. As in geometry, proof is by contradiction. Has the husband left for another? Yes, it's painful, hard, insulting, hopeless ... Epithets can be selected endlessly. And you can sit down and try to think differently: a holy place is never empty, and "his" departure - the prospects for new acquaintances, hobbies, flirting, and so on. One page of life is turned upside down - another begins. If there are children, then, of course, the situation is more complicated. But after all, no one can cancel the financial and other assistance of the "former"! Therefore, do not behave as if "life was cut short". No! What does not kill us, it makes you stronger - take this worldly wisdom, and it will teach you how not to cry from pain, but to protect yourself, your inner world from external cruelty.
From a smile
Psychologists often recommend: when they start to scratch the cats on the heart - go to the mirror and smile. First with a stretch, even if your smile will look like a grin. Then again, again and again ... Until the smile turns out to be joyful, sincere, wholeheartedly. And at this moment you will feel, how it becomes easier, lighter, and that which tormented, ceases to be so important. Repeat the exercise more often, smile at your reflection, rejoice to see yourself! Tested in practice: this method is good not only for those who are thinking how to do so as not to cry. He will help anyone to cheer up, to find cheerfulness and self-confidence. Therefore, remembering the famous words of Baron Munchausen, smile, gentlemen, smile!
Distracting moment
If you are interested in how never to cry, you are forced to upset you: it is unworkable. No wonder the poet said: "He who did not cry, he did not live." But to reduce the experience to a minimum - this you can. How? Learn to switch and distract. Feel that "rolled" and is about to overwhelm - try to get distracted. Someone for this grabs a vacuum cleaner or a washing powder, someone enthusiastically scribbles on the typewriter, trying to kill the "nausea" anticipation of a new outfit. Someone saves the kitchen and the original recipe, while others pull themselves out of the swamp bush with rhythmic music, comedy or an action book, prayer, meditation, sports equipment and even sex ... All means are good here if they only give the necessary mental relief and serve Effective lightning rod.
Turning to a shout
Yes, if you are strangled with tears, it will be useful to "trickle down". In the cry, we express not only accumulated emotions, but also physical stress. Close yourself in your room and shout everything that comes to your mind - violently, without restraining yourself, into your voice. You literally immediately feel better, you'll see. However, then there will be talks with neighbors, and not about the weather ... But this is a slightly different story.
Peace of mind is in our hands
Soulful, i.e. Inner peace is a special state of harmony with oneself, appeasement. He achieves the choice of the way of thinking and the ability to look at life's problems from different angles.
- Learn to "gratefully accept" not only the gifts of fate, but also its lessons, be wise with life.
- Look around you with the awareness that "I can do everything" and not "I am a victim."
- Be able to wait for change: all sorrows pass, the Earth spins and time runs forward.
- Do not wind yourself! Do not try to represent negative situations and believe in them. On the contrary, visualize positive, iridescent pictures, dream boldly and winged. The universe will hear you!
- Hence follows the following principle: do not live by the past! If it was unsuccessful, you should not gnaw again and again - it weakens your energy, will, consciousness. And if successful with instability in the present - it will "stab" you and also not give rest.
- Do not scold yourself constantly. But do not regret it all the time. Love yourself, forgive, but do not forget about objectivity.
And, finally, the main thing is to educate yourself in positive thinking and live, rejoicing at every new day. After all, life is priceless - it is your life!