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How to deal with her jealousy? Signs and causes of female jealousy

An inconspicuous look in the direction of a passing girl, a polite smile addressed to a pretty waitress, a delighted exclamation involuntarily torn from her lips at the sight of a fatal beauty, and ... your girl is furious. Vigorously sparkling eyes, she reproaches you for treason, arranges grandiose tantrums and scandals, cries, and then does not talk for weeks. Grabbing at the head, you are experiencing a painfully familiar state of "deja vu," listening to a flood of improbable accusations, and frantically trying to find a way to deal with her jealousy and get rid of regular "debriefing."

What is jealousy?

Jealousy is defined by psychologists as a negatively colored psychological sense of property, arising in relation to a loved one, a friend, a loved one. This is a personality lack of attention, love, concern on the part of the object of jealousy, which allegedly gives it to others. Feeling eats away the soul, does not give rest, lifting from the depths of the soul the flow of the most negative aggressive emotions (anger, hatred, humiliation, rabies). Sometimes the poison of jealousy is so capable of poisoning the soul of a woman, that it is solved by reckless actions that threaten the life and health of a loved one, his new (or imaginary) passion actions.

Jealousy in many cases becomes the main reason for the separation of pairs. Women are more relaxed about the jealous half, while men do not tolerate this behavior of their lover.

Catalysts

Jealousy arises, as a rule, due to existing complexes. Someone is embarrassed by their appearance, someone - social position, profession, considering themselves unworthy party for a more successful or beautiful partner. This feeling is a direct result of low self-esteem, self-doubt, habits to disassemble their failures and shortcomings. Therefore, such a woman is constantly afraid that a loved one can leave her at any time for a more worthy candidacy. In other cases, the woman's jealousy is due to her excessive selfishness and spoiledness, a pronounced sense of ownership. A person with a similar character, accustomed to receiving everything and at the first whim, considers a man as a thing that should belong to her and only to her. Any attempt to halve at least blink in the presence of another woman is severely suppressed, ending with a colossal scandal. Such women, being abandoned, are usually vindictive and dangerous, and are ready to struggle desperately for the escaped "thing".

Manifestations

The question "How to deal with her jealousy?" Becomes vital, if your woman from gentle and kind gradually turns into an aggressive "Holmes in a skirt." She daily arranges an audit of your personal belongings, looks through messages and a call log, organizes interrogations with addiction. She nervously reacts to women's voices in the background when making telephone calls and invariably accompanies you to all "outlets", up to gatherings in a purely male company. And the slightest manifestation of discontent threatens you with its terrible resentment, a stream of tears and punishment in the form of empty pots and a pile of dirty shirts. Such behavior can be called nothing but paranoia and seriously think about how to defeat the jealousy of a lover without compromising your relationship and your own health.

What is dangerous jealousy

Desperate jealousy does not always mean deep and strong love. Most likely, it is a protective mechanism of the individual, aimed at preserving what is hers by right or caused by the fear of a woman to remain alone. In addition, the female nature is such that constantly needs to confirm the partner's feelings, regular calls and SMS, undying attention and care.

According to psychologists, slight signs of jealousy in relationships should always be present. They are not burdensome for both partners and even are pleasant, adding feelings of some saturation, excitement and taste. However, do not abuse jealousy, otherwise it will turn into a cocktail of aggressive emotions, capable of poisoning any relationship.
Worst of all, that, killing the feelings of one man, a woman often continues to desperately be jealous and a new partner until she realizes that it's time for her to change her character. But this is not every woman who can get rid of this destructive feeling. Your task is to help her as much as possible in this.

How to deal with her jealousy?

Before you accuse your woman of excessive jealousy, think about your own behavior and try to put yourself in its place. Perhaps her fears are not groundless? If you:

  • Until late evening you are lost at work, forgetting to warn her about being late for dinner;
  • In many respects do not trust her;
  • Pay little attention;
  • After returning from work, silently eat dinner and flop on the sofa, closer to the TV, forgetting to ask your beloved how her day went;
  • Look at pretty girls;
  • Do not give flowers and gifts;
  • Do not write passionate SMS and do not call several times during the day;

However, for all your incorrect actions and absent-mindedness, still love her - the reasons for your lover's jealousy are precisely in you and your strange behavior.

More care and attention

If you are filled with the determination to maintain a relationship regardless of whether your passion is excessively jealous or whether the reason for everything is you, the first thing you need to do is to surround your girlfriend, wife with tremulous attention, touching care, stepping over your restraint and principles. Write her messages and call at least three times a day, since this is necessary for her peace of mind, and therefore for yours. Give her flowers, often say compliments, suggest that she is unique and unique. Emboldened by your love, she will gradually forget about her fears and blossom right before her eyes.

Less views on the sides

Teach yourself not to look at the beauties with your feet from the ears in the presence of your jealous passion. You can calmly contemplate the feminine charms, being alone or in the company of friends. And in any case do not flirt with her friends. A friend, in the opinion of a woman, is the first who heads a list of potential mistresses of her partner. Friends, despite the notorious female friendship, in the soul - rivals. They constantly, even unconsciously, try to prove to each other their superiority in such factors as appearance, social status, self-realization and personal life.

Jealousy to a friend in many cases is justified. Competition between the fair sex in rare cases can go so far that one of them, trying to prove that she is better, prettier and sexier than a friend, really becomes the mistress of her husband. Therefore, in the name of tranquility, it is better to keep from the friends of your jealous lover as far as possible.

Straight Talk

Elimination of jealousy is often facilitated by frank and confidential conversations between partners. Share with her as much information about yourself and your affairs, ask for advice, actively take an interest in her life. Try to convince your woman of her feelings and loyalty. Prove to her that there is no reason for jealousy. Try not to deceive her, because even a single lie can ignite a fire of distrust. Introduce your beloved with all your friends and work colleagues, demonstrating that you have nothing to hide from her.

What not to do

  • You do not need to shout at her and blame him for being too suspicious.
  • Ignore calls and SMS.
  • Especially stay at work to annoy her.
  • Demonstratively examine other women and flirt with them.
  • To punish coldness and silence.
  • Praise her partner with her partner.
  • To reproach and point out its complexes and shortcomings.

Before you look for effective methods, how to deal with her jealousy, soberly evaluate your own behavior. If you are still sinless, and she is too jealous, take the time to look for an adequate substitute. It is better to try to eliminate this destructive feeling from the soul of the lover and keep your relationship.

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