Communication is crucial in today's world, subject to pressure, high speed and technology. And against the background of everything that happens, we sometimes forget how to listen. This is how people who have learned to hear others do it.
Use body language
Put your phone down and face to the other person. Eliminate or at least limit background noise and other distractions. This will help you focus on the words of another person. Keep straight eye contact and turn the body and shoulders towards the interlocutor. Such attention is necessary to show that you are included in the dialogue. If you do not really listen, then you will immediately give out the body language. Even if your interlocutor does not do the same, you should become a good example.
Observe non-verbal signals
Words are not the only part of history. When you talk face to face with someone, notice whether he is tapping with his foot, looking into your eyes, or whether his smile is twisted. Non-verbal signals are just as important as words. And you will have more chances to notice them if you remain calm and pay attention to them.
Do not interrupt
When you talk, you can not really listen. Let your interlocutor freely express everything that is on his mind. Perhaps it will be difficult for you not to interrupt, especially if you are emotional or really want to express your point of view. But the less he speaks, the less information you have. If you want to say something really important, wait until the interlocutor pauses.
Do not be tempted to offer solutions
If someone talks about a problem, refrain from advice. If the interlocutor wants to hear your opinion, he will ask you about it. Perhaps he just wants to speak out and get approval, although you should not do it if you do not agree. In any case, you can ask if he wants to hear your thoughts. When you propose a solution, it may seem that you are rejecting a friend's problems, and not helping him.
Do not translate the conversation to another topic
If even this happened and the conversation turned to another topic, send it back to the original one. Apologize and remind the interlocutor of what he said. You can say: "I'm very sorry that we are distracted. So what did you talk about? ".
Take notes
If you are at work, the notes will help you remember what was discussed in the conversation. Even if you do not view them, the writing itself will allow you to better remember everything.
Show empathy
Put yourself in the place of the interlocutor in order to understand what is happening, and to be with him at the moment. Show how much you understand his feelings. Of course, this does not mean that you have to agree with everything that he says. You can smile or nod to show that you are listening without taking anyone's hand.
Remain open
Do not make assumptions or conclusions about what the interlocutor says. Such a prejudiced attitude can make you miss something important.
Think before you speak
After the interviewee has finished speaking, think a few seconds before you start talking. This will give the interlocutor an understanding that you are thinking about what he just said. And he will know that you are not trying to speak out once the conversation is over. Think about whether you should propose an exit, or it is better to just ask follow-up questions.