A wedding is what a rite? What is the mystery of the wedding? The rules of the wedding in the Orthodox Church

The wedding ceremony has ancient roots, it originates from the IX-X centuries and has not only beautiful content, but also carries a deep meaning. The wedding is a rite that connects a man and a woman in the face of God to eternal love and faithfulness, turning marriage into a sacrament related to spiritual being.

The essence of the wedding

In today's world, unfortunately, many people misinterpret the very essence of the sacrament and refer to this church rite as a fashionable and beautiful event that can brighten up the solemn day of marriage. Even without thinking about the fact that the wedding is not a mere formality. To go to this step should only those people who believe in the eternity of marriage on earth and in heaven. And to make such a decision is possible only with mutual consent, as an informed and well-considered act. It should not be forgotten that the rite refers to one of the seven sacraments, as a result of which the grace of the Holy Spirit is transmitted to man, and it happens in an invisible manner.

Wedding Rules

If all the same relations in the pair are checked by time, the feelings are deep, and the desire to perform the ritual is well weighed, then it is worth familiarizing with the conditions without which it is impossible to marry in the Orthodox Church. The rules are mandatory for execution:

1. The basis for the wedding is the marriage certificate.
2. The main role in the family is assigned to the husband, who must love his wife selflessly. A wife must obey her husband of his own free will.

It is the husband who is responsible for keeping the family's relationship with the church. Debunking is allowed only in the most emergency situations, for example, with the change of one of the spouses or in the case of mental illness. By the way, the latter can also be the reason for the refusal of the wedding.

In ancient times, there was such a custom when young people applied to the priest about the wedding, he announced this to the people's veche, and only after the lapse of time, if there were no people who could report the impossibility of marriage, a ceremony was held.

The total number of weddings a person can not exceed three times throughout his life.

Only young people baptized and their witnesses are admitted to the rite, there must always be a cross on each one.

If someone from the wedding does not know whether he is baptized or not, it is necessary to discuss this issue with the priest. As a rule, a positive response is possible with the consent of young people to give birth and raise children, following the Orthodox traditions.

Age restrictions: a man must be at least 18 years old, and a woman must be at least 16 years old.

The wedding is an originally Christian rite, therefore people who profess another religion (Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, etc.), as well as atheists are not allowed to it.

The ban on marriage is imposed if the bride and groom are related, even in the fourth generation. And it is undesirable to make a marriage between godparents and godparents.

If a married couple has a collateral marriage, the wedding is prohibited.

But such circumstances as the pregnancy of the wife, or if the newlyweds do not have a parental blessing, are not a reason for refusing to be married.

When can I get married?

According to the Orthodox calendar, weddings can be held throughout the year, except for the days of the big posts - Christmas (from November 28 to January 6), Great (seven weeks before Easter), Petrov fast (from the second Monday after the Trinity until July 12), Uspensky From 14 to 27 August), Maslenitsa, on the eve of all the great church holidays. Wedding ceremonies are held on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. But, according to popular beliefs, Wednesday and Friday are not suitable for the performance of the sacrament. And it is also better to avoid the wedding on the 13th.

But the happiest periods for the marriage are the periods after the Intercession in the autumn, from the Epiphany to the Pancake Week in winter, between Petrov and the Uspensky fast in the summer, on Krasnaya Gorka in the spring.

Many couples want to marry on the day of official registration of marriage, but it can not be called right. Priests, as a rule, dissuade young people from this kind of hasty actions. It's best when couples get married on the anniversary of their wedding or after the birth of their children. The later this happens, the more aware this action will be. The year of the wedding will be a memorable event, which will be witnessed by sincerity of feelings and confidence in family ties.

Preparing for the wedding

Of particular importance is the process of preparing for such a ritual as a wedding in the Orthodox Church. The rules are also present here.

The very first thing that needs to be done is to decide on the church and the priest who will conduct the rite. This is a fairly important task, because the choice must be made by the soul. Young in the temple should be comfortable and calm, only so the whole process will have a really great significance. Whether it will be a small church or a majestic cathedral depends first and foremost on the wishes of the young, absolutely the whole atmosphere of the holy place should harmoniously fit not only into the spiritual essence of the ceremony, but also respond to the soul of a young couple who decided to tie their destiny forever.

With the priest, we must also talk, discuss not only the organizational aspects, but also look at each other, find a common language - this is also very important for the rite. Very many priests pay special attention to the conversation with the newlyweds, sometimes they can advise to postpone the procedure or to wait, then the priest's advice should be heeded.

More importantly, not all priests have the right to conduct a wedding ceremony, for example, it is forbidden to do this as tonsured monks and under the canonical prohibitions. Sometimes the rite can be performed by a priest from another church or cathedral, if, for example, he is their spiritual father.

Organizational moments of the ritual

With the priest it is necessary to agree the date and time for which the Orthodox wedding is appointed. The rules of church life require this. Sometimes in the church at the same time, several couples can get married, this nuance also needs to be discussed. It should be taken care of, if several operators are conducting photo and video shooting for the wedding so that there is no confusion, and this does not spoil the whole rite.

Even a week before the wedding, young people should start fasting: do not eat meat, do not drink alcohol, do not smoke, refrain from marital intimacy. Before the wedding, the newlyweds must attend divine services, confess and receive communion.

Also, you need to worry in advance about buying icons of the Savior and the Mother of God, which must necessarily be consecrated, wedding rings, which before the ceremony should be given to the priest, candles, two white towels and four handkerchiefs. It should be noted that according to church canons, rings should be bought for the groom of gold, for the bride of silver. As a rule, the acquisition of all necessary attributes is entrusted to witnesses.

The tradition of using icons in the wedding ceremony also has ancient historical roots. Since ancient times, parents have blessed their children with the use of holy icons: the son of Christ the Savior, the daughter of the Mother of God, thus giving instruction on the true path.

It is customary to leave a reward for the wedding ceremony, and the priest should also ask about money. If a couple does not have the financial ability to pay the full amount, you can talk about it. Sometimes the amount is not disclosed at all, and the father offers to give alms to the church, in the amount that is possible for the newlyweds.

Choosing a dress for the bride

As for the wedding dress of the bride, which she wears at the wedding in the Orthodox Church, the rules are as follows:

• Dress should not be very tight or short, but too lush and chic outfits also do not fit;
• In no case should the shoulders, decollete or arms above the elbows be denuded;
• You can use a cape that covers the exposed parts of the body;
• The outfit should be white or other color of pale shades;
• The head must be covered, for this use a handkerchief or veil;
• You can not use too bright makeup and a rich fragrance of perfume;
• Instead of a wedding bouquet, the bride should have a wedding candle in her hands .

Also, you should take care of shoes in advance, shoes with a closed forelock on low heels are best, because the wedding ceremony lasts about an hour, the bride should feel comfortable throughout this time.

There is a very interesting belief. The bride's dress must be with a long train. According to the folk story, the longer the train will be - the more time the young will be together. If the train in the attire is not provided, it can be attached only for the time of the wedding.

Also, when the wedding takes place in the Orthodox Church, the rules apply to the appearance of all the guests present. Women should be in dresses or skirts with covered knees, also should not denude the neckline and hands, the head should be covered with a handkerchief or scarf. At the wedding ceremony, not necessarily the presence of all the guests of the wedding, it can be people who really believe in the sacrament of the ceremony and treat this process sincerely. To comply with the formalities, it is better not to attend such events, but only to a banquet.

Wedding Ceremony

The wedding always begins only after the service. The ceremony consists of two stages: the first is engagement, the wedding is the second stage. In the past, they were separated by time. After the betrothal, the couple could part, if there were any reasons, the wedding could take place only if the feelings were strong and sincere, because the husband and wife chose each other not only for earthly life, but for all eternity. In the modern rite both components of the ceremony take place in one day.

Betrothal

Betrothal takes place at the entrance to the church. The bride is on the left of the groom. The priest reads a prayer, after which he blesses the couple three times and gives them lighted candles. Again he recites a prayer and engages young rings. The rings are changed from the hand of the young to the bride's hand three times, as a result, the golden ring of the groom remains on the young man's hand, and her silver ring on the finger of her future husband. Only now the couple can call themselves the bride and groom.

Wedding

The priest leads a couple into the temple and puts before the analoy on a white towel. A man and a woman are asked whether they came here in good faith, whether there are any obstacles to marriage. Witnesses take up the crowns and hold them over the heads of the bride and groom. Here it should be noted that it is not so easy to do, especially if the witnesses are short, but the young ones are high, and the ceremony time is not less than forty minutes in the city churches, and if the ceremony is held in the monastery, then more than an hour. Therefore, it is desirable to choose witnesses higher. After the prayers that have been read, the young are brought out a cup of wine, which they must drink three times as a symbol of that from this moment everything in the pair will be divided equally - both happiness and bitterness.

It is necessary to warn the bride: during drinking from the cup of wine, there may be a situation when the veil is very near the candle and ignition will occur. To prevent this from happening, it is advisable to worry in advance about the length of the veil, which should not be too large.

The hands of the newlyweds are tied with a white towel and they are circled around the analo three times. At this time, the church choir sings. Father brings a couple to the Royal Gates of the altar and reads edification for eternal life together. After the wedding, all the guests begin to congratulate the young, and a bell ringing, which marks the birth of the young family, is heard.

If the young have a desire to capture a long memory of the wedding, photo and video shooting can be carried out with the permission of the priest. It is most correct to agree where exactly the operator should be, how it is better for him to stand or move. Usually in churches and cathedrals there is enough specific lighting, therefore, in order to ensure that the quality of the shooting is not upset later, it is advisable to consult a good specialist. There are cases when shooting is strictly forbidden, then, so that a memorable event is left in the family archives, you can take photos against the background of the cathedral or temple.

Wedding on the Kingdom

There is another ancient custom, which should be mentioned, in order to bring some historical clarity, - the wedding of the kingdom. This ceremony was held during the coronation ceremony of the monarchs, and the first was Ivan the Terrible. The crown, which was used in this case, went down in history under the name of Monomakh, known all over. The obligatory attributes of the action were the barms, the power and the scepter. And the process itself had a sacral content, the main essence of which was the sacrament of chrismation. But this ritual has no relation to marriage.